I had a fantasy once of a loving relationship. Growing old together with her. My relationship over 5 years with my fiance however has devolved to the point where we are basically roommates. She's not affectionate anymore, we haven't had sex in a year. Anytime I bring up sex she changes the subject. We have no common interests, in music, movies, politics, life views. I stopped mentioning talks of having kids and have moved on from the idea. On Valentine's Day I tried to rekindle things yet she ignored me completely and I eventually gave up. I felt so lonely on Valentine's Day I almost texted for an escort even though shes in the other room.
Yet the other day she asks "When are we getting married?" and I looked at her perplexed like... really? She still says she loves me and wears the ring I gave her. She posts pictures of me on her Instagram. Yet in real life she doesn't talk to me. Won't touch me. She sits in bed all day staring at Tik Tok. Up to this point I have remained loyal in this """relationship""".
If I am honest with myself, in the past we were both broke and needed each other to help pay rent. Now thats no longer the case I have a job well enough to pay it all, however she still makes minimum wage. I have tried to help her over 5 years financially but shes racked up 10's of thousands in debt, while I have saved close to 50k and no debts.
I feel bad to abandon her after 5 years but I feel emotionally she has abandoned me long ago. It now also makes no sense financially to saddle myself in debts for a sexless marriage.
How do I let go? She legitimately would not be able to afford any rents here without me. I don't know where she would go. I feel bad but I also feel like she should no longer be my burden. Help me Dab Forums.
Cut your losses desu. I'm feeling similar to you user and I wish someone told me to cut my losses too, and not be afraid of the future.
Jacob Butler
shows absolute character to remain loyal under such circumstances. do not deprive yourself of a happy future by commiting to someone who doesn't appreciate you. don't feel bad either if you have to end it, because from the sounds of it, it is the right thing to do.
Ian Gonzalez
Relationship therapy
Jose Anderson
>If I am honest with myself, in the past we were both broke and needed each other to help pay rent. Imbecile. This needed saying.
Charles Miller
>together for 5 fucking years >still not married (and not because you don't believe in marriage, since you say you're engaged) >moving in together out of convenience, not commitment Dude seriously, you're both a bunch of morons. You're in a toxic relationship. She's bad for you and you are bad for her. The only reason you're still in this """"relationship"""" is fear, not care or even pity.
>She legitimately would not be able to afford any rents here without me. I don't know where she would go. This is bullshit. It comes across as insincere as fuck. You don't care about her, just like she doesn't really care about you. You simply don't want to come across as a bad person. This is vanity, not charity. Wise up kid. Fucking tell her everything you told us, and break up. It's not working out between you too. And next time don't fornicate. And don't move in together with someone you're not certain you want in your life until you kick the bucket.
Caleb Russell
You can't fix something that doesn't exist. OP hasn't been in a relationship for a long while now. LMAO, they're not even talking to each other. This is straight out of some fucked up comedy skit.
James Young
Aye.
No she could only realistically afford $600 a month in rent due to her car payments, school debt, credit cards etc. Rents here start at $1200. I bought a home with a low interest so the payment is only $900. I would be fine. She wouldn't make it. I've done the math.
Jose Jackson
Bro I'll be honest, life is too short to play games and wait around for people to get their shit together.
Juan Baker
That's a big factor. Also that she doesn't listen. She has traded in her new car twice already and owes 60k on something worth 12k. Can't help her if she won't listen.
