Whats the best most foolproof way to develop a genuine connection with a woman in her 20's, to the point where you can give them a 10+ second hug and have them truthfully tell you that you make them feel safe and loved?
To specify: I'm not talking about kissing, sex, living with them or having a relationship with them, I just want to get to this part once in my life (I know no one is entitled to shit from anyone else though) I've already been lifting for a year and I want my arms to feel as protective and as cozy as possible for a woman
my stats: -23 -physically attractive (girls/women have often been initially interested in you from school/work and approached you or showed very clear signs/unwarranted respect/assumed you knew a lot of people but completely lost interest after you talked) -6'1 -financially stable -severe anxiety and autism (level 1 asd)
>I'm not talking about kissing, sex, living with them or having a relationship with them Generally, you kind of need to be in a relationship with someone before they feel so comfortable and safe with you that they tell you "you make me feel safe and loved" and actually feel that way about you.
And modern requirements for getting in a relationship generally require you to have had sex at least a few times before committing emotionally to each other.
Isaac Foster
Those things aren't the result of a genuine connection OP. They can be but they should never be mistaken for that. Never tell yourself you have a genuine bond with a woman because of 10+ second hugs and them telling you they feel secure. Women can always feel more secure with someone else, especially in their 20ies. Anyway, a genuine connection, or love if you will, can probably only exist through spending a lot of time with a person. And you have to also check if that time spent isn't out of a lack of a better option. A genuine bond with a woman is one where you trust her to stand by your side even if you aren't financialy stable or healthy for some time.
Tl;dr: I think you're looking at the wrong characteristics for spotting a genuine connection. Try looking for a connection YOU feel secure and loved. It usually takes time to develop (and be proven as such).
Michael Carter
>Anyway, a genuine connection, or love if you will, can probably only exist through spending a lot of time with a person What if they're just a nice and kind enough person with high openness that sees you in the same way you see a trusty pen rather than a beloved 10 year old dog they raised since they were a puppy, to the point where they would feel sad if they lost that pen? Like I can speak to girls at work sometimes and occasionally they are so amiable and empathetic its almost like they care about me even though I've only known them for a few days
Kevin Price
Just try spending more time with her because if anything she’ll let you know if she feels comfortable or bothered by you
Gabriel Morgan
Find a good cognitive behavioral therapist or Aba therapist. You most likely didn't take EIBI when you were younger since you are fairly low level but if you took it when you were younger you would have been undiagnosable.
Go therapy now while you are fairly young.
Brody Hughes
>Go therapy now while you are fairly young. Aba seems more concrete than cbt One thing I fail at is passing as normal in my mannerisms, other adults sometimes figure out I'm autistic in 30s even, is 23 still young enough to see significant change? I just want to be adult like, normal and manly in how I carry myself around others and behave in general
I feel like a toddler around other adults, like they run circles around me and are in on a joke I wouldn't even be able to conceptualize in my head How much is my failure when talking to women related to the autism and anxiety and how much is it to blame on my actual character as an adult human male?
Your stats are the exact same as mine except no autism or anxiety and instead I'm really funny and kind.
The truth is all that stuff doesn't matter if you find your other half it just doesn't.
Aiden Watson
I actually think specific ABA therapists may be able to bring you towards that higher level of social functioning though it would have to be one that specializes on social skills such as empathy, eye contact and even flirting is part of current treatments.
The guy in the video does fairly well in conversation actually, but the topography of his speech has some anomalies that don't exists in normal speaking like robotic talk and lack of vocal inflection which can certainly be treated.
As someone who go into picking up women and was fairly successful at it while at the same time majoring in Applied Behavior Analysis I'm actually wondering if it would make sense to have a practice around the use of ABA to help men specifically how to pick up women whether they are on the spectrum or have some social skill blindspots due to their unique situations.
Luke Nguyen
Coming from a girl, you're already at an advantage due to your height. You are right to be lifting as big arms definitely feel protective and cozy. I'd like to add fluffy hair to the criteria - long on the top, bit shorter on the sides like the guy's in the video as it seems to look good on every male imo especially if you are going for the cozy vibe. Good luck
Kayden Nelson
I've met girls like that too, is the question whether i consider that a genuine connection? If so my answer is no. They can evolve to be good friends but so far they aren't proven by test of time or when something is at stake.
Josiah Myers
Any tips on finding a good aba therapist?
Connor Lee
Go date a church girl for a few months. They tend to value relationships and intimacy a bit more than most women, especially in more conservative churches.
Step one: find a conservative church. Regardless of your beliefs just go find one. Be open minded and listen to what people talk about. Don't look for the differences you have any of their beliefs but try to relate with their beliefs. This doesn't me lie. Just tell them your curious about Christianity and keep going. Always talk to people everytime you go. I recommend the Church of christ denomination with a big congregation.
Step 2: talk to the girls. Talk to the girls bro. Ask them questions about their beliefs and hobbies outside church. Find one you think is pretty that is showing you the most interest. Btw most these girls have been raised in the church and their parents have them thinking they will marry a guy from the church. In all honesty most don't want to do that but at the same time they don't want to go against their parents wishes. The fact that you are an outsider, a young man with questions about god with make all these girls panties soaked. Just keep that in mind and have confidence in yourself.
Step 3: get baptized. Regardless of your beliefs just do it. But only after you have a girl who has shown you a lot of interest. Maybe you've even had a date or are hanging out outside of church. The reason I recommend the Church of christ is because baptism is the biggest part of being saved. Once you do this. That girl, will fall in love with you. No fucking lie. She will fall head over heals. I swear bro. This shit works every time...
It sounds crazy but worst case scenario you learn something about a church and most likely meet some people who are most likely genuinely are good or at least try to be good. Best case you get what you want to feel which is a girl who says she feels safe with you and means it. Which most likely will happen. It works man
P.s. don't mention the autism
Jayden Baker
>23 Good >Physically attractive Very good >Tall Excellent >Financially stable Amazing, why aren’t you drowning in pussy? >Autistic and anxious Oh...feels bad man
Joshua Baker
Why do christcucks always want people to suppress anything different about themselves? No wonder everyone hates you.
Levi Martinez
That will only happen if the girl actually knows you want her to say it. It is a very specific need you have and most people don’t think about saying something like that. Now, you can’t just go asking that from any random chick. She needs to be a really good friend who you are extremely open with. Friendships are based on common interests. So go ahead and make yourself more interesting. (I.e. join a dance club, shooting range, church, whatever you want). Also, when a tall guy with toned arms gives a girl a hug, they DO probably think “this is nice”, but wouldn’t say it because of fear of freaking you out.
Aaron Ross
>but wouldn’t say it because of fear of freaking you out. Why would it freak you out?
Leo Davis
Social media destroyed everything, what you anons see here is some goofing around for like 20s seconds, you have no clue how their life really is.
The truth is , people like this are extremely insecure and try to appeal to a certain group of people for validation, ergo you loners and outcasts.
The true happy couples aren't on fucking TikTok posting shit all day. If you manage to find a decent woman to wife up and have some kids there is where your happiness will lie, not wanking yourself to death on /gif/ or wasting time on TikTok watching zoomers fake their happiness for validation.
Nathaniel Wright
decent women in a meaningful relationship wouldn't give a clip for a webm thead op
Isaiah Bailey
...
Adam Ross
>a genuine connection with a woman Make her imaginary lol >you can give them a 10+ second hug and have them truthfully tell you that you make them feel safe and loved? That's a based fantasy but it's never going to happen, dude.
