I used to think that people who cheated on their partners were losers. Now I am one of them.
I have a very nice life, my lifelong partner and my three children adore me, and the feeling is mutual. The problem is that I'm not really happy and I have a desire for other people. I feel stuck. I've talked to my boyfriend about it but he doesn't want me to leave, he panics and gets angry. It's killing me.
I have spent years questioning these emotions and pushing away advances. One day, I had a revelation: what I was feeling was not going to go away, so why bother? I might as well come clean
Recently, I had two sentimental adventures and I kissed the people in question, without sleeping with them. Maybe it will come. Most of the time, I don't blame myself, which is surprising because I thought it would be the case.
Here is my dilemma: am I leaving everything for a passion and an intense connivance that I cannot experience at home, at the risk of destroying the world of my spouse, my children and our family? Or do I stay, like a beautiful doll in a clean environment, with a well hidden secret? The second solution does not make everyone suffer.
>What should I do? Do what you will. It's in your genes. People who cheat do so because they are biologically incapable of monogamy. To put it bluntly, you're an r-selected slut. You should have never married or had kids. You're a pest on society.
Daniel Hall
New things are always exciting, that's just how vertebrates work. Fucking vertebrates.
On one hand, the cycle is just going to repeat if you go for it. Your children lose their mother, your husband loses their faith in humanity/women, you gain back a bit of your freedom in exchange for security or whatever. On the other hand, you spend the rest of your finite and singular life being miserable wondering about what could have been while lying to yourself, your husband, and your children about being happy, probably taking it out on them, and dying unfulfilled.
It doesn't really matter, does it.
Adrian Cooper
You're literally a loser, and you will use that as a justification. You're a narcissist, "Oh my kids adore me", yeah no sweetie they think mommy's a whore. You've obviously done some intense mental gymnastics to justify this thought but here's the long and short. Your husband, being of sound mind, does not want you sleeping about with other men (Which is absolutely the standard). He is angry because his WIFE is saying "I want to sleep around". Are you mad? Who wouldnt be upset by that thought. You've been naval gazing too long, wake the fuck up and actually reassess your life
Hunter Watson
you arent married so its not cheating on a spouse. i wonder, are all 3 children from one man
Jacob Scott
Wanting to hurt those who have done the most for you in life is just part of being a woman. I say go for it, hopefully your partner kills you or you leave the kids so he can raise them correctly without you in the picture.
Michael Nguyen
>Wanting to hurt those who have done the most for you in life is just part of being a woman. It's called Eve's Curse. Women are inherently evil depraved creatures.
Colton Hill
This is the correct answer. It could also be mental illness, but either way your family is as good as ruined.
Ayden Miller
>we have 3 children You fucked up. There is no way of resolving this now.
Most people should not cheat. You let your emotions get the best of you. You are driven by emotions and you depend on the feeling of being desired to feel complete.
The problem with this is that you always end up creating this misanthropic environment that is not maintainable. Most likely than not what you will end up doing is neglecting your partner's needs and focus all your passion towards your new man. Your family breaks down and your child go through a traumatic event that could have been prevented if the other man was never in the picture.
Now my personal philosophy in cheating is to keep it a secret. I have admitted to myself that I just have this insatiable appetite for flesh, so I can never be a one-woman man, but I want the benefits of a stable family. That's why I cheat, but I make sure to only cheat with women that I know will not mess up my life. I also put forth safety nets to make sure the girl I'm cheating with has no chance to hurt my family.
Now after reading your entry, you just seem like you haven't really matured emotionally and looking for someone to complete you, but I can guarantee you that you (and I have broken up with adultery partners for this) you will eventually destroy your family and the guy you are cheating with because you are just going at it recklessly.
You have the illusion of two paths, but the truth is there is only one path for you. Again, coming from someone who has been cheating for quite a long time now.
>It's called Eve's Curse. Women are inherently evil depraved creatures. Cheating is more entrenched in men than women. We are biologically wired to kill conquer and fuck. Women are biologically wired to be conquered by strong men. Current culture keeps both gender from fulfilling either of that and so it's left to our emotional intelligence to modulate these shortcoming in reality.
Christopher James
> lifelong partner Not > husband Just leave him already but don’t be a worthless cunt and steal his money in the process. It’s your decision to leave why should he be financially punished for your lack of loyalty?
Kevin Nelson
My best mate grew up with a cheating mum, she's old and ugly and still posts cock tease shit on FB. Broken home, parents gave up because of fighting ect
It doesn't affect him day to day but needless to say he doesn't have any teeth left because he's been smoking weed for a decade to cope with a life his parents never taught him to succeed in because they were busy with their own BS and neglecting him
You're going to get dicked down for a few hours a week but your fucked up kids will get dicked down for their childhood
Adrian Clark
he wont marry the mother of his children. i have no sympathy for him
Dylan Foster
>my lifelong partner >I've talked to my boyfriend >the world of my spouse just how many men do you faggots keep around?
Justin Moore
This. I think this is a bait thread though
Carter Rodriguez
lifelong partner = spouse = boyfriend
I just used different words. Excuse my poor perfectly. He's my husband.
Thomas Turner
I wish
Daniel Ward
this get over yourself slut
Jason Powell
personally i do the second thing
i really like your term sentimental adventures
I'm prohibitively wary of sexual congress for bringing disease into my house but sentimental adventures have helped feel the emptiness
i've never wanted to leave her though
Thomas Thompson
if its not bait, you are a fucked up person for sure
Ryder Turner
I personally believe that if you've made the commitment to marry someone, you have forfeited the chance at having relationships outside of that marriage unless the two of you mutually divorce. You made a commitment to your partner that you would be with them for better or for worse. Leaving now to pursue passion and more intense encounters is a symptom of a midlife crisis and is what many people go through because they feel they are losing their youth and their chance at excitement. This is even more prevalent since you have children. It will only lead to regret on your part, and you will be making irreparable damage to your relationship, and potentially to your kids' image of you. The best thing you can do for everyone, including yourself, would be to seek counseling and come clean with your significant other.
Anthony Ramirez
Do whatever you want. Just know that once you leave, you'll never get back what you had. If your husband finds out, he might forgive you, but he'll never forget your betrayal. Once your kids find out, they'll never see you in the same way again. I'm not going to say that it's right or wrong for you to cheat, but it's wrong to blame anyone but yourself if you do. Be honest with yourself. Why would you cheat on someone who you claim to adore? Accept responsibility for your own choices, whatever they may be.
Oliver Roberts
Why don't you just be honest with your partner and have an open relationship?
Aiden Edwards
Don't come here for advice.
Gavin Lewis
Worst advice so far. Ruins your life in just under a second.